Divorce is a very personal act. It is, however, embedded in the very public institution of the courts, and so there are many reasons why some people who are unhappily married remain that way. They fear the embarrassment. They may feel the personal pain of having been betrayed by the person they loved and the prospect of making that public in a divorce proceeding may be overwhelming. They may think it is better for their children.
But if your marriage is dissolving before your eyes, if it has grown sterile or loveless, is this how you really want to spend the rest of your days? Divorce may be uncomfortable and painful, but is it more painful than inaction?
An older woman writes of the pain that immobilized her after her divorce.
She notes that during December she was wistful of Decembers-past when she received shocking news. A man she knew, who was successful, brilliant and about to get married in Lake Tahoe, died of cancer after failed treatment.
She found this shocking, as he had always appeared to be the picture of health, and if he could die that quickly…. She took this as the incentive to begin dating again.
While it is a truism that life is short and unpredictable, the failure to act can paralyze many. But events may come along, as with this woman, and force action. Speaking with an attorney is one way to clarify if the unknown is as scary as it seems.
A divorce may be necessary for many reasons, but only you will know for certain what those reasons are. We all are granted a limited amount of time in our lives and remaining in an unfulfilling marriage is unlikely to be a good way in which to pass that time.
Source: thehuffingtonpost.com, “ My Grey Divorce,” Kat Forsythe, Divorce Magazine, January 15, 2016